06.04.04 :: 9:42 am
Of course, it helped that Lemur and I got loaded on vodka beforehand. I passed out, clothed, with the TV on in my bed several hours later and had a really strange and heartbreaking dream about Mr. M. The gist of it was that he wanted to come back to me and I welcomed him with open arms and when I began kissing him all over his face, he asked me to slow down and suggested we needed to take things at a snail's pace. There was some other stuff... I don't know. It made me sad. I wish I could make myself stop thinking/caring about him still. What my problem is exactly, I have no idea. I guess I'm one of those people who dwell on uncontrollable situations. It's been a year since the ex-fiance and I broke up, and a suitable replacement has yet to surface. Scratch that; replacement is the wrong word. "New Boyfriend" is better. NB, wherever you are, just know that I've stopped looking for you. And I've gone the celibate route, too. I might make exceptions to makeouts, but other than that, I'm out of comission. So. Tired. |