11.19.03 :: 9:24 am


This morning I got to use the new 311 number for non-emergency sorta-emergencies.

Bright and early at 5:03 am EST, a bakery truck that was parked directly underneath my window got haunted and its alarm started wailing. And I mean wailing.

Any tried and true New Yorker can usually let this thing go and sleep right through it, but it was literally underneath me, and when the owner of said truck didn't show up after ten minutes to fix the situation, I freaked out.

I called the number on the truck. No dice.

And then I called 311. And man are those folks ever the best. I said "Tow the fucker." And they did! They did!

I want to send them all some FTD bouquets, those beautiful, beautiful people.

My sleep was ruined and I look like death warmed over twice, but at least I know that a Rockland Bakery truck is sitting in an impound lot somewhere in Brooklyn and it warms the darkest recesses of my twisted, black heart.

earlier / next