2001-03-21 :: 12:16 a.m.

It's lonely when you're up and no one is on Instant Messenger.

Friday night Drummer Boy invited me to a party his bandmate is having, I think for his birthday. He said I was welcome to bring along my fellow Whorenuns. I think they'll be pleased.

When things are going well I get scared. I wonder if Rock Star Ex is scared over on his side of things. Parts of me still only respond to him. I have to figure out a way to turn them off. Or write them a new code. I have no manual for these things, I have no way of knowing how my own circuitry works. I'm afraid of pulling the wrong lever, flipping the wrong switch. Altering the mechanics permanently, for worse. It's like asking a toaster to do a blender's job.

Or something.

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